Surviving long term travel as a couple

When we first told people about this trip, they said, “Wow. Either you guys will find out that you can’t live without each other or break up after a month.” Think about it – even if you are living together, you still don’t spend 24/7 with your partner. Both of you work at least 8 hours a day, hang out with other friends or pursue individual hobbies. When traveling, you will be spending ALL YOUR FUCKING TIME with your significant other. You will find out things that you never knew, especially pertaining to bodily functions, and you will get in fights often. These tips can keep you both sane and happy for the long haul…

Take time apart from each other – Make sure to have a few moments to yourself every day. Just because you’re traveling together doesn’t mean you have to be attached at the hip. One person might lay on the beach reading while the other takes a surf lesson. Maybe you want to check out a museum while your partner needs some serious time at the internet cafe. Do your own thang then reconnect later.

Meet other people – As a couple, it can be easy to isolate yourselves from other travelers. Chatting with other peeps is a great way to break up the monotony of your conversations. I mean, there are only so many times you can listen to your partner’s same, tired-ass stories. Travelers are a gregarious bunch, so striking up a conversation is a piece of cake. If you can’t, you’re either socially awkward or really lame.

Exercise caution when hungry/tired/hungover– Reason goes out the window if either person is feeling these human urges. Try to recognize these things in your partner before you get in a fight about what side of the street to walk on. Anticipate when you will go long periods when you are unable to eat…bring snacks. Once you see the warning signs, tread lightly and don’t take things personally.

Have clear and separate responsibilities – In your normal life, you are used to making your own decisions, like, “What do I want for lunch?” or “I’m gonna buy these dope sneakers.” When you are traveling on a shared budget and shared time, however, making these unilateral decisions is trickier. Your first instinct will be to talk everything other, but this inevitably leads to disagreement or frustrating “I don’t care”, “I don’t care either” discussions. Delegating decision making and responsibilities is key. For instance, TD is always in charge of tracking the budget and Kim deals with transportation planning. This avoids so many little tiffs, it can’t be emphasized enough.

Seek out a prostitute for the evening….just kidding!

Make time for intimacy – Surprisingly, gallivanting around the world from one exotic locale to another can take a toll on your sex life. When you spend every waking, and non-waking, hour together, special occasions for intimacy don’t really present themselves. At the end of a long day, all you want to do is eat some dinner and pass the fuck out. You both need to be willing to put out the effort – every sexologist out there will say this makes for a stronger relationship and minimizes stupid, meaningless fights, especially important for traveling companions. Don’t forget date night.

Be gentle with one another and pick up the slack – Sometimes you will be facing high stress situations, which will make you want to pull you hair out. Learn each other’s freak out triggers – maybe you can’t deal with getting lost and your partner hates aggressive touts. Take the lead when you see that your partner is growing increasingly flustered.

Above all else, remember why you are on this trip to begin with – to share an amazing, once in a life time experience with the person you love most. Hopefully, these tips will prevent you from strangling one another. Happy travels!